As soon as I was pregnant, I wanted to shout it out to the world. The 12-week wait was painful and I didn’t manage to make it very far before spilling the beans to my mum (10 weeks), a close friend at work (8 weeks) and my personal trainer (5 weeks).
Being my first pregnancy, I wanted to make sure we were well past the 12-week ‘danger zone’ and we ended up announcing our little bundle of joy to the world at 15 weeks.
Once each new person found out it was like a switch flipped. The way people treat you when you are pregnant is so different. It’s like all of a sudden you are a porcelain doll!
When I found out I was pregnant it was just a blasé pee on a stick ‘just in case’. I was having hot flushes in the middle of winter which was out of character, so I was just making sure I wasn’t pregnant – turns out I was! I called hubby into the lounge and his face when he looked at the faint line on that stick was one of disbelief. In fact, he didn’t believe it at all! He made me re-do the test which showed a bold undeniable pregnant line.
I have to say that I am glad nothing too much changed in our relationship when I became pregnant. He didn’t start opening car doors or any of that nonsense. At the time I was half expecting him to start panicking about baby-proofing and life insurance but life just went on!
It was refreshing though because outside the home it was a different story all together.
Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I wished that he would have had more interest in how my body was changing and sometimes I did just want to be pampered. In hindsight, I do regret the hormonal rampages I went on every couple of months when he wasn’t acting like the whole world was changing (because it was for me).
I guess the take away is that when a woman becomes pregnant she is a mother straight away (whether you are ready or not). Your body and mind change and everything you do is affected directly by the little being you are creating. Your food, sleep and activities change instantly whereas for your partner not much changes except your figure and temperament.
That being said, the dad switch finally flipped when i was crowning and Alan has been the most amazing dad to our son ever since.
I know for next time that I shouldn’t expect so much from him as it is difficult for him to relate when for the most part, life just seems to go on as normal.
There is a life-long hierarchy in my mother’s house about after-meal dishwashing. The 2 eldest (me and my sis) are entitled to washing and the two youngest are only allowed to dry and put away.
Apparently when you are pregnant you are not allowed to do either!
For the first time ever, I was treated like a princess and told to sit, with my feet up while I was brought food, tea and chocolate.
Of course, it didn’t last past the first trimester and I was back in my birth-right position of dish-washer once the novelty wore off.
And that’s the thing! The announcement of becoming pregnant was a ‘flavour-of-the-month’ kind of thing with a lot of people.
It would start out as an amazing ‘how are you feeling today’ moment which quickly passed and became a ‘can you please run the meeting today, after you finish these files… thanks’
As the pregnancy progressed and I started to implement processes for when I was due to leave it started to become pretty clear what was happening.
It became apparent that I was becoming irrelevant and, in a sense, redundant.
Of course, this was bound to happen at some point, I had planned to take a year off work and so my team would have to work without me as a go-to at some point. Having that happen while I was still present 9-5 was a bit surreal.
Now, 4 months into my maternity leave I get the ‘when are you coming back? We miss you!’ which I know will fade if I were to step into the door any sooner than planned.
This was probably my most favourite change to occur, simply because it seemed to be the most consistent. The initial outpour of love and affection continued through my pregnancy and into the early weeks of Jaxon’s arrival.
This bump was a long time coming for a lot of people in my life and my friends were all so excited to become aunties. And some even ‘fun-ties’ (non-related aunties, just there for fun).
This one has got to be the most stressful of them all. Suddenly people are asking you personal questions and touching your belly without asking.
They take it upon themselves to tell you about their own children’s births (in graphic detail) and tell you about the ugliest side of pregnancy possible (‘you know you gonna poo right?’)
They also look at you like you are crazy for going for a walk or to the gym (my fat ass lifting weights at 8 months pregnant must have been a funny sight for some people I’m sure).
Anyway, these are just a few of the experiences I had as a first-time pregnant mum. I do wonder if it will be the same second time around though.
Did you experience a change in attitude towards you when you either told people you were pregnant or later on in your pregnancy?
I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!